How To Help Someone With Hoarding Disorder

Hoarding Disorder is a complex condition that can be incredibly destructive to a person’s life and overwhelming for loved ones to deal with. It is an especially difficult disorder to deal with because sometimes, hoarders aren’t able to recognize that their hoarding habits are a problem. If they do recognize it’s a problem, then they often feel overwhelmed by the thought of seeking help. They can feel an intense attachment to everything they own, whether it has a practical use or not. They let their homes fill up to the point where they can barely move around. These conditions make the home a breeding ground for mold and bacteria, and insect and rodent pests like mice and bed bugs. These conditions are detrimental to the health of all inhabitants and extensive decluttering and cleaning is necessary to improve living conditions in the home. Anyone who has dealt with a loved one with hoarding disorder knows how difficult it is to help them. First Response is here to help with this guide to help a hoarder. Follow these tips to improve your ability to help.

Hoarders are incredibly possessive of their belongings. Even with the best intentions, it is not a good idea to touch or try to get rid of anything without permission. Doing so will cause a hoarder distress and damage your relationship with them. Putting a hoarder in this state will cause them to distance themself from you, be less likely to seek professional help and continue engaging in their unhealthy patterns.

Being judgemental with a hoarder will cause them to feel shame and distress that makes them become even more reclusive. Don’t let your frustration get the better of you and express it to the person you are trying to help. It is important to be empathetic, supportive and encouraging when trying to get a hoarder to agree to clean and declutter their home and seek professional help.

Extreme hoarding cases don’t happen quickly. It usually takes years or even decades for a home to become virtually unlivable due to hoarding. When a hoarder agrees to get rid of some of their stuff, it is important for you to understand that the process will take time. Expecting to get the home completely cleaned and decluttered in one go can cause a hoarder to become frustrated and can slow down their recovery process.

Enabling the behaviours of a hoarder simply reinforces in them that their behaviours are acceptable. You can’t control their behaviours, but you can control your own. Think about ways you may be enabling a hoarder’s behaviour. Do you give them gifts for special occasions? Do you go shopping with them? Do you offer to hold on to some of their items? These may seem like short-term solutions to help a hoarder, but they are not helpful for someone with hoarding disorder, so avoid doing anything that will enable their behaviours.

Expecting a hoarder to completely declutter and clean their home right away is unreasonable.  Their recovery will be a long and difficult process and expecting perfection at any point in this process will be more harmful than helpful. Small and gradual changes are incredibly valuable even if they don’t seem like it. A hoarder can experience setbacks during their recovery as well which can be frustrating to you if you expect perfection from them. Rather than becoming frustrated and potentially doing something that can set their recovery back further, remain empathetic and help them get back on track.

If you are constantly trying to clean up after a hoarder, you are giving them one less reason to seek professional help and change their behaviours on their own. It may seem like cleaning up is helping them overcome their disorder, but it doesn’t address the underlying cause of their hoarding disorder.

Homes that have been subjected to years or decades of hoarding are in need of an incredible amount of work to declutter and clean. It is important that the hoarder takes part in the cleanup process to help with their recovery, and offering your assistance can help. However, an extremely slow process can cause frustration for everyone involved. Hiring professional hoarding cleanup specialists, like First Response, can bring in extra hands to help get the job done more quickly. It is important to consult with the hoarder you are trying to help first and make sure they are okay with the decision to hire a cleaning service, and make sure they take part in the cleaning process as well, but a professional hoarding cleanup service understands the intricacies of hoarding disorder and will work with the hoarder patiently and empathetically to get more done. If your loved one with hoarding disorder wants that kind of assistance in cleaning their home, then contact First Response today! We’re here to help with the stuff so you can focus on the person.